Ruth Soukup: (01:55)
Thanks for having me. I'm thrilled to be here.
Jean Chatzky: (01:58)
Congrats on your book!
Ruth Soukup: (02:00)
Thank you!
Jean Chatzky: (02:01)
I heard your NYC book tour was a hit!
Ruth Soukup: (02:08)
It was a blast meeting your team!
Jean Chatzky: (02:12)
For those who don't know you, share your journey before you embraced fear.
Ruth Soukup: (02:25)
I was once a frightened girl, battling severe depression and near-fatal attempts at my life. After years of darkness, I hit rock bottom at 29, feeling lost and hopeless.
Jean Chatzky: (03:19)
That's heartbreaking. Many relate to your struggle. How did you start moving forward?
Ruth Soukup: (03:41)
I took tiny steps. People often think there's a magical moment of clarity, but my recovery involved many small, daunting steps. My dad encouraged me to walk on the treadmill, and that simple act led me to seek therapy and start rebuilding my life.
Jean Chatzky: (05:44)
What does it mean to act despite fear?
Ruth Soukup: (05:47)
Courage isn't the absence of fear; it's taking action when fear is present. Many don't recognize their feelings as fear, labeling them as anxiety or overwhelm. Understanding this helps us act even when we feel afraid.
Jean Chatzky: (06:46)
You conducted research showing that fear manifests differently for everyone. Can you share your findings?
Ruth Soukup: (07:02)
Absolutely. My research surveyed over 4,000 people grappling with fear and how they overcome it. We identified seven distinct fear archetypes, revealing that fear often operates subconsciously, affecting how we perceive ourselves and our actions.
Jean Chatzky: (09:05)
Let's explore those archetypes, especially concerning money. Many women fear investing or running out of retirement funds. What are the most common archetypes?
Ruth Soukup: (10:37)
The procrastinator archetype is prevalent. This perfectionist mindset stems from the fear of making mistakes, leading to excessive preparation and analysis paralysis.
Jean Chatzky: (11:12)
This is a huge issue with financial decisions.
Ruth Soukup: (11:12)
Exactly! Fear of making the wrong choice can halt progress entirely, which is often the worst decision.
Jean Chatzky: (11:34)
Right? With so many choices and information, research can easily become overwhelming.
Ruth Soukup: (11:57)
Exactly. Each archetype has strengths and weaknesses. For procrastinators, traits like attention to detail can be beneficial, but overcoming the hindrances of perfectionism is key.
Jean Chatzky: (12:58)
If someone identifies with this archetype, how can they push through?
Ruth Soukup: (13:15)
Approach it both micro and macro. Start with manageable decisions that come with lower risk. Practice making choices and embracing mistakes. This builds confidence for larger decisions.
Jean Chatzky: (14:12)
What's the second most common archetype?
Ruth Soukup: (14:15)
The rule follower archetype, which is closely followed by the people pleaser archetype. Rule followers fear authority and often need clear guidelines to succeed.
Jean Chatzky: (14:41)
Kelly and I can relate; we're not rule followers.
Ruth Soukup: (14:46)
Right. Those who follow rules often excel when provided clear directions, particularly in financial matters.
Jean Chatzky: (15:49)
And there's plenty of prescriptive advice on finances.
Ruth Soukup: (15:49)
Absolutely. The next archetype is the people pleaser, who fears judgment and often prioritizes others' opinions over their own needs.
Jean Chatzky: (16:15)
Got it. How can someone break that cycle?
Ruth Soukup: (17:34)
People pleasers should practice saying no and setting boundaries. Start small and gradually work up to tougher decisions.
Jean Chatzky: (18:01)
Absolutely! Recognizing these behaviors is crucial.
Ruth Soukup: (18:05)
Exactly! Awareness is the first step to change.
Jean Chatzky: (19:11)
So true. Let's take that test. Where can people find it?
Ruth Soukup: (19:27)
Visit doitscared.com to take the test.
Jean Chatzky: (19:31)
It's been enlightening chatting with you. You mentioned both you and your husband share traits of an outcast archetype. What does that mean?
Ruth Soukup: (19:43)
The outcast often appears fearless but actually fears rejection. This can lead to isolation and difficulty asking for help.
Jean Chatzky: (21:29)
Thanks for sharing your story. We appreciate your insights!
Ruth Soukup: (21:40)
Thanks for having me!
Jean Chatzky: (21:41)
Stay tuned for Kelly and the mailbag.
Jean Chatzky: (21:48)
Kelly Hultgren's here. Hi, Kelly!
Kelly Hultgren: (21:52)
Hello!
Jean Chatzky: (21:53)
That was enlightening. Thank you for that.
Kelly Hultgren: (21:56)
It was a great discussion, focusing on the nuances of fear surrounding money.
Jean Chatzky: (22:21)
Let's move on to some questions.
Kelly Hultgren: (22:22)
Sure!
Jean Chatzky: (22:23)
Did you see We Bought a Zoo?
Kelly Hultgren: (22:25)
Yes, I have.
Jean Chatzky: (22:27)
Do you watch A Million Little Things?
Kelly Hultgren: (22:30)
No, should I?
Jean Chatzky: (22:31)
Absolutely! It's binge-worthy.
Kelly Hultgren: (22:50)
I'm in need of a good show.
Jean Chatzky: (22:51)
Shtisel is another great option.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:01)
Sounds intriguing!
Jean Chatzky: (23:01)
It's in Hebrew and fantastic.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:07)
What's it about?
Jean Chatzky: (23:07)
It's a family drama with depth.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:12)
I'm intrigued!
Jean Chatzky: (23:21)
I think it's worth a watch.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:23)
I'll check it out.
Jean Chatzky: (23:24)
It's very engaging.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:24)
I'll definitely add it to my list.
Jean Chatzky: (23:25)
You won't regret it!
Kelly Hultgren: (23:28)
I'll make time for it.
Jean Chatzky: (23:29)
Let's get back to the topic at hand — fear.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:30)
Absolutely. It ties into many of our listeners' experiences.
Jean Chatzky: (23:31)
Yes, many struggle with fear of failure and success.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:32)
Exactly! It's a common battle.
Jean Chatzky: (23:33)
It definitely resonates with many.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:34)
I see that in my own life.
Jean Chatzky: (23:35)
Same here. Let's tackle those fears together.
Kelly Hultgren: (23:36)
Agreed! Together, we can make a difference.
Jean Chatzky: (23:37)
Let's empower each other!
Kelly Hultgren: (23:38)
Absolutely!
Jean Chatzky: (23:39)
Thanks for joining us, everyone!
Kelly Hultgren: (23:40)
Bye!
